5: Romeo & Juliet Unit IV, Recognizing Assumptions
rUnit IV. Topic: Recognizing the assumptions you make about people.
Unit IV, Part A: The DBT Handout.
The book has a very useful, if brief, section on how to become aware of your assumptions about people and how to check them out. In the play, Juliet makes a series of false assumptions about Romeo, based on what she hears of the fight from her nurse. Participants will apply the handout to Juliet's process in recognizing her mistaken beliefs.
False assumptions, of course, are rampant among residents, until people take the time to check them out. Here is one part of the handout (pp. 148-9). (The other part is an example the author uses):
Characters : NURSE, JULIET, ROMEO.
Scene: Shortly after Tybalt killed Mercutio and Romeo killed Tybalt. Juliet’s bedroom.
NURSE Ah, well-a-day! he's dead, he's dead, he's dead!
We are undone, lady, we are undone!
Alack the day! he's gone, he's kill'd, he's dead!
O Romeo, Romeo!
Who ever would have thought it? Romeo!
JULIET What devil art thou, that dost torment me thus?
This torture should be roar'd in dismal hell.
Hath Romeo slain himself?
NURSE I saw the wound, I saw it with mine eyes,--
A piteous corpse, a bloody piteous corpse;
Pale, pale as ashes, all bedaub'd in blood,
All in gore-blood; I swooned at the sight.
JULIET O, break, my heart, break at once!
Vile earth, stop moving; end your motion here;
For thou and Romeo share a common grave!
NURSE O Tybalt, Tybalt, the best friend I had!
O courteous Tybalt! honest gentleman!
That ever I should live to see thee dead!
JULIET What storm is this that blows so contrary?
Is Romeo slaughter'd, and is Tybalt dead?
Then, dreadful trumpet, sound the general doom!
For who is living, if those two are gone?
NURSE Tybalt is gone, and Romeo banished;
Romeo that kill'd him, he is banished.
JULIET O God! Did Romeo's hand shed Tybalt's blood?
NURSE It did, it did; alas the day, it did!
JULIET O serpent heart, hid with a flowering face!
Did ever dragon keep so fair a cave?
Beautiful tyrant! fiend angelical!
Dove-feather'd raven! wolvish-ravening lamb!
Despised substance of divinest show!
Just opposite to what thou justly seem'st,
Was ever book containing such vile matter
So fairly bound? O that deceit should dwell
In such a gorgeous palace!
NURSE There's no trust,
No faith, no honesty in men; all nought.
These griefs, these woes, these sorrows make me old.
Shame come to Romeo!
JULIET Blister'd be thy tongue
For such a wish! He was not born to shame:
Upon his brow shame is ashamed to sit;
For 'tis a throne where honour may be crown'd
Sole monarch of the universal earth.
O, what a beast was I to chide at him!
NURSE Will you speak well of him that kill'd your cousin?
JULIET Shall I speak ill of him that is my husband?
Ah, poor my lord, what tongue shall smooth thy name,
When I, thy three-hours wife, have mangled it?
Why did my husband kill my cousin?
That villain cousin would have kill'd my husband:
My husband lives, that Tybalt would have slain;
And Tybalt's dead, that would have slain my husband:
All this is comfort; wherefore weep I then?
Some word there was, worse than Tybalt's death,
That murder'd me: I would forget it fain;
But, O, it presses to my memory,
Like damned guilty deeds to sinners' minds:
'Tybalt is dead, and Romeo--banished;'
That one word 'banished,' to speak that word,
Is father, mother, Tybalt, Romeo, Juliet,
All slain, all dead. 'Romeo is banished!'
Where is my father, and my mother, nurse?
NURSE Weeping and wailing over Tybalt's corpse:
Will you go to them? I will bring you there.
JULIET Wash they his wounds with tears: mine shall be spent,
When theirs are dry, for Romeo's banishment.
Take up those cords: poor ropes, you are beguiled,
Both you and I; for Romeo is exiled:
He made you for a highway to my bed;
But I, a maid, die maiden-widowed.
Come, cords, come, nurse; I'll go to my wedding-bed;
And death, not Romeo, take my maidenhead!
NURSE Go to your chamber: I'll find Romeo
To comfort you: I know well where he is.
Hark ye, your Romeo will be here at night:
JULIET O, find him! Give this ring to my true knight,
And bid him come to take his last farewell.
Unit 4, Part C: Discussion Questions
This time there is one main discussion topic, but it is a long one:
1a. In this scene Juliet makes 3 false assumptions, one after the other, about Romeo. What are they? How does she correct them? Is she using good DBT skills?
1b. For review, unless clients mention this skill answering the first question: Juliet uses one DBT skill not in the handout, but which we discussed earlier. Any guesses? Follow up with: How does Juliet utilize "dialectical thinking" about Romeo?
Unit IV, Part A: The DBT Handout.
The book has a very useful, if brief, section on how to become aware of your assumptions about people and how to check them out. In the play, Juliet makes a series of false assumptions about Romeo, based on what she hears of the fight from her nurse. Participants will apply the handout to Juliet's process in recognizing her mistaken beliefs.
False assumptions, of course, are rampant among residents, until people take the time to check them out. Here is one part of the handout (pp. 148-9). (The other part is an example the author uses):
Mindfulness to Personal InteractionUnit IV, the play: Act 3, Scene 2..
Observe and describe what is going on in the situation. Describe to yourself what the other person is actually saying and actually doing. Just put words on what is happening, without editorializing or letting your mind wander to assumptions or what you think you know about the situation or the other person’s motives.
Take a nonjudgmental stance. Be attentive to your judgments and assumptions… and then let go of them….Remember that judgments are often conditioned reactions that don’t always accurately reflect the situation and sometimes cause you emotional suffering...
Stay present. Don’t leave the discussion abruptly or without warning…Don’t make excuses to get out of the discussion or situation, dissociate, or tune out. Be where you are, with your full attention and intention.
Stay willing. Be willing and open to stay in the discussion, even if it’s difficult…
Characters : NURSE, JULIET, ROMEO.
Scene: Shortly after Tybalt killed Mercutio and Romeo killed Tybalt. Juliet’s bedroom.
NURSE Ah, well-a-day! he's dead, he's dead, he's dead!
We are undone, lady, we are undone!
Alack the day! he's gone, he's kill'd, he's dead!
O Romeo, Romeo!
Who ever would have thought it? Romeo!
JULIET What devil art thou, that dost torment me thus?
This torture should be roar'd in dismal hell.
Hath Romeo slain himself?
NURSE I saw the wound, I saw it with mine eyes,--
A piteous corpse, a bloody piteous corpse;
Pale, pale as ashes, all bedaub'd in blood,
All in gore-blood; I swooned at the sight.
JULIET O, break, my heart, break at once!
Vile earth, stop moving; end your motion here;
For thou and Romeo share a common grave!
NURSE O Tybalt, Tybalt, the best friend I had!
O courteous Tybalt! honest gentleman!
That ever I should live to see thee dead!
JULIET What storm is this that blows so contrary?
Is Romeo slaughter'd, and is Tybalt dead?
Then, dreadful trumpet, sound the general doom!
For who is living, if those two are gone?
NURSE Tybalt is gone, and Romeo banished;
Romeo that kill'd him, he is banished.
JULIET O God! Did Romeo's hand shed Tybalt's blood?
NURSE It did, it did; alas the day, it did!
JULIET O serpent heart, hid with a flowering face!
Did ever dragon keep so fair a cave?
Beautiful tyrant! fiend angelical!
Dove-feather'd raven! wolvish-ravening lamb!
Despised substance of divinest show!
Just opposite to what thou justly seem'st,
Was ever book containing such vile matter
So fairly bound? O that deceit should dwell
In such a gorgeous palace!
NURSE There's no trust,
No faith, no honesty in men; all nought.
These griefs, these woes, these sorrows make me old.
Shame come to Romeo!
JULIET Blister'd be thy tongue
For such a wish! He was not born to shame:
Upon his brow shame is ashamed to sit;
For 'tis a throne where honour may be crown'd
Sole monarch of the universal earth.
O, what a beast was I to chide at him!
NURSE Will you speak well of him that kill'd your cousin?
JULIET Shall I speak ill of him that is my husband?
Ah, poor my lord, what tongue shall smooth thy name,
When I, thy three-hours wife, have mangled it?
Why did my husband kill my cousin?
That villain cousin would have kill'd my husband:
My husband lives, that Tybalt would have slain;
And Tybalt's dead, that would have slain my husband:
All this is comfort; wherefore weep I then?
Some word there was, worse than Tybalt's death,
That murder'd me: I would forget it fain;
But, O, it presses to my memory,
Like damned guilty deeds to sinners' minds:
'Tybalt is dead, and Romeo--banished;'
That one word 'banished,' to speak that word,
Is father, mother, Tybalt, Romeo, Juliet,
All slain, all dead. 'Romeo is banished!'
Where is my father, and my mother, nurse?
NURSE Weeping and wailing over Tybalt's corpse:
Will you go to them? I will bring you there.
JULIET Wash they his wounds with tears: mine shall be spent,
When theirs are dry, for Romeo's banishment.
Take up those cords: poor ropes, you are beguiled,
Both you and I; for Romeo is exiled:
He made you for a highway to my bed;
But I, a maid, die maiden-widowed.
Come, cords, come, nurse; I'll go to my wedding-bed;
And death, not Romeo, take my maidenhead!
NURSE Go to your chamber: I'll find Romeo
To comfort you: I know well where he is.
Hark ye, your Romeo will be here at night:
JULIET O, find him! Give this ring to my true knight,
And bid him come to take his last farewell.
Unit 4, Part C: Discussion Questions
This time there is one main discussion topic, but it is a long one:
1a. In this scene Juliet makes 3 false assumptions, one after the other, about Romeo. What are they? How does she correct them? Is she using good DBT skills?
1b. For review, unless clients mention this skill answering the first question: Juliet uses one DBT skill not in the handout, but which we discussed earlier. Any guesses? Follow up with: How does Juliet utilize "dialectical thinking" about Romeo?
posted by Michael S Howard at 3:09 PM
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